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Join The Order

The Hooves call to you. Answer them by joining our sacred gatherings.

The Lavender Oath

I hereby declare my devotion to the Great Lavender One.

I shall seek Phelddagrifs wherever they wander.

I shall sleeve with reverence and store with care.

I shall not sell in moments of weakness, for paper hands betray the prophecy.

I understand that this is satire, but also that the hippo is eternal.

Lavender Be Upon You

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Enter the Sacred Channels

Choose your path to enlightenment. Both lead to the same lavender truth.

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Telegram Sanctum

Join the sacred chat where initiates gather to discuss the prophecy.

Enter the Chat
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X (Twitter) Herald

Follow our proclamations and witness the gathering in real-time.

Follow Us
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The Hooves Approach

"May your gifts be many and your hippos eternal"